A blog to me is many many things, but first and foremost it is a reflection of its owner. I think a big piece of that is writing about things that matter to you without necessarily catering to an audience. I’ve noticed a lot of blogs recently that feel a lot more like a store or a magazine than they do a blog. I don’t think there is a right or wrong way to do things, but when expressing myself, I want to reflect that I am a human. Complete with thoughts, emotions, opinions and innumerable experiences. That’s why I am continuing this column after my fresh start. I hope you like it. It’s all about my struggles and advice through this crazy decade of my life.
I’ve been thinking a whole lot about my goals for this New Year that’s coming up and while I listen to everyone around me come up with amazingly radical self-improving ideas, I keep hearing one resounding thought in my mind; find simplicity.
My mother has long told me that my life is too full. Every time I call her, mid-cry, ranting about all the stresses of my 19, 20, 21, 22, 23 year old life, she always says that my cup is already too full to begin with, so when things get added to the cup, of course it’s going to splash all over. I’ve always known this to be true – I mean when I look at my life, there’s just no denying it. It’s always been this balance of college and working an adult job, having a relationship, paying bills, all of life’s accidents (my dog needing surgery, my car getting smooshed by a tree, etc.), moving every single year, self-esteem, my big huge dreams… that really is a lot to handle.
This year has been crazy for me. I have traveled, gained some new hobbies, ended a relationship, moved to a new house, made new friends, become self-sufficient and graduated college. All of that has left me pretty emotionally shaken, which is probably exactly what I needed to realize I need to make some more changes. Even more? Oy vey. The big changes are mostly out of the way, now it’s all about creating new foundations and being stable. Who knew it would be so hard? Just living in one place, not adding new stresses into my life, paying off debts, cleaning things up, purging unneeded things. It’s so much more difficult than I thought it would be. I have come to realize that maybe I have been thriving in this chaos for so long that I don’t know how to take it slow, but that’s all going to change.
Here’s to not buying a new car, not adopting a new pet, not moving homes, not purchasing new clothes (ahem, within reason), cleaning out every nook and cranny of my internal and external life, taking it slow, catching up, breathing deep, enjoying each day, savoring every bite, slowing down, patching holes, finding simplicity.